Mrs. Independent

Garry and I met in the fall of 2000, when I was 24. It was a good time in my life. I had a job that I really enjoyed and though law school at night was a struggle and draining, I learned a lot and appreciated the experience. I was independent. I had my own car, shared a townhouse with some lovely ladies, had my own bank account. Crazy independent.

Garry and I were married in 2003, and I think that I have become lazy in my dependence. Case in point: the dog zap-zap. A few months ago, Garry bought a sensor to keep Quincy, who loved to go searching in the garbage can for treasure, out of the kitchen. If he gets too close, he gets a warning signal (beep! beep!) and if he proceeds, he gets a little zap-zap. The device sat on out kitchen floor for weeks and weeks and even more weeks. I'd ask Garry, from time to time, to please hang it up on the wall so that the kids would not play with it, bump it, and just plain old try to destroy it. And it just never got done. So finally, I broke down, found a nail, a hammer, and put the darn thing up myself. I think that the process took all of ten minutes, and that included the time it took to find a nail in the black hole that we call the garage. And I wondered, why did I wait so long? Where did Ms. Independent, conquerer of all, go?

I don't know where the line is between making Honey-Do lists so I do not feel overwhelmed in my responsibilities and just taking care of the things that I know that I can take care of. But I think that I discovered a line today. I am trying to move Macey into Emma's room, and I need to move Emma's dresser approximately eight inches. I cannot get it to budge, and I am sensitive to the fact that I am pregnant and should not be trying to make it budge in the first place. This one just might have to wait for Garry.