The Problem With Thigh-highs

As my baby bump got bigger, I stopped wearing nylons on Sunday and instead decided to try thigh highs.

Oh, how I have learned to loathe them.

Here's the problem with thigh highs. They suck in your calves (thank you!) and even suck in your thighs (again, thanks!) but that leaves nothing to suck in my butt. In fact, now with my sucked in calves and thighs, my butt looketh like it runneth over.

It creates the worst image in the world! I have this huge bump in front and this unfortunate booty in the back. It's as though my butt has created an equilibrium on the other side I never requested.

So, yesterday after the unfortunate pink sweater mistake, I went to Motherhood Maternity for something nice to wear to Valentine's Day dinner. And when they asked if I needed any nylons, I ignored the price and said "yes, yes I do."

Death to thigh highs!